Self-Discrepancy vs. Self-Esteem: What You Should Know

Dr Neeshu Rathore
Dr Neeshu Rathore

A/Prof, Psywellpath Founder

 
May 15, 2025 3 min read

Understanding the concepts of self-discrepancy and self-esteem is essential for anyone interested in mental health. Though they are related, they serve different roles in shaping how we perceive ourselves and our well-being. Let’s dive into each concept, compare them, and see how they influence our mental health.

What is Self-Discrepancy?

Self-discrepancy refers to the gap between how we see ourselves and how we wish to be seen. There are three main types of self-discrepancies:

  1. Actual Self: This is who you believe you are at present.
  2. Ideal Self: This is who you aspire to be, your goals, and dreams.
  3. Ought Self: This represents who you think you should be based on societal or familial expectations.

Example of Self-Discrepancy:

Imagine you see yourself as a hardworking student (actual self), but you dream of being a top scholar (ideal self). If you feel pressured to get straight A's because your parents expect it (ought self), this gap can lead to feelings of inadequacy and disappointment.

What is Self-Esteem?

Self-esteem is the evaluation of your own worth. Simply put, it’s how much you value yourself. High self-esteem means you have a positive view of yourself, while low self-esteem can lead to negative thoughts and feelings.

Types of Self-Esteem:

There are generally two types of self-esteem:

  • High Self-Esteem: This leads to confidence and a positive outlook on life.
  • Low Self-Esteem: This can cause feelings of unworthiness and can affect your mental health.

Example of Self-Esteem:

Consider someone who feels confident in their abilities and appreciates their worth. They are likely to take on challenges and handle setbacks better. In contrast, someone with low self-esteem might shy away from opportunities, fearing failure or judgment.

Comparing Self-Discrepancy and Self-Esteem

While self-discrepancy and self-esteem are interconnected, they have distinct characteristics:

Feature Self-Discrepancy Self-Esteem
Definition Gap between actual, ideal, and ought selves Evaluation of self-worth
Focus How we perceive ourselves versus who we want to be How we value ourselves
Impact Can lead to feelings of failure or disappointment Influences motivation and resilience

How They Influence Mental Health

Both self-discrepancy and self-esteem play critical roles in our mental health:

  • Self-Discrepancy: A large gap between your actual self and your ideal self can lead to anxiety, depression, and a sense of failure. The more significant the discrepancy, the more likely you are to experience these negative feelings.
  • Self-Esteem: Low self-esteem is often linked to various mental health issues, including depression and anxiety. It can lead to a lack of motivation, making it harder to achieve your goals, which may further widen the self-discrepancy gap.

Real-Life Impact

Consider someone dealing with self-discrepancy and low self-esteem:

  • Scenario: A young professional feels they should be more successful (ought self) and compares themselves to colleagues (ideal self). They may feel inadequate (actual self) and struggle with anxiety at work.
  • Effect: This can hinder their performance, creating a cycle of self-doubt and dissatisfaction.

Understanding the differences and connections between self-discrepancy and self-esteem can help individuals and professionals identify areas for personal growth and improvement in mental health.

Dr Neeshu Rathore
Dr Neeshu Rathore

A/Prof, Psywellpath Founder

 

Clinical Psychologist, Associate Professor in Psychiatric Nursing, and PhD Guide with extensive experience in advancing mental health awareness and well-being. Combining academic rigor with practical expertise, Dr. Rathore provides evidence-based insights to support personal growth and resilience. As the founder of Psywellpath (Psychological Well Being Path), Dr. Rathore is committed to making mental health resources accessible and empowering individuals on their journey toward psychological wellness.

Related Articles

Dr Neeshu Rathore

Maximize Learning with the 70/20/10 Model

Discover how the 70/20/10 model can revolutionize your learning process. Explore its components, benefits, and real-life applications for effective development.

#70/20/10 model
October 11, 2024 3 min read
Read full article
Dr Neeshu Rathore

Recognizing the Signs of Mental Illness: A Guide

Discover 50 signs of mental illness that can help you identify when someone may need support. Learn about behaviors, feelings, and more.

#signs of mental illness
October 11, 2024 3 min read
Read full article
Dr Neeshu Rathore

Mastering the Abbreviated Mental Test Score

Dive into the Abbreviated Mental Test Score (AMTS), its significance in assessing cognitive function, and how it can be applied in real life. Learn about types and examples!

#Abbreviated Mental Test Score
August 15, 2024 3 min read
Read full article
Dr Neeshu Rathore

A Journey Through A Clinical Lesson at the Salpêtrière

Dive into the fascinating clinical lessons at Salpêtrière, where psychology meets history. Discover famous cases, treatments, and their impact on modern psychology.

#Salpêtrière
June 10, 2024 3 min read
Read full article